Divorce and Remarriage

     Today we talked a lot about what goes on a lot today in this world. A ton of parents are getting in a divorce and sometimes a remarriage. During divorce tons of people always say "I could have" or "I should have". Divorce is hard so and so they always blame themselves and get mad at there selves and wish that they hadn't married there spouse or wish they could have fixed the marriage. 70% of males after divorce wish they could have saved their marriage and 70% of males after the 2 year of divorce they are more likely to get married. I think that's crazy how men get married more likely after divorce first before women. 

    Most of the time divorce families get 50/50 custody but it usually it doesn't even look like fifty fifty custody. Usually the mother has the children Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday and the dad would get one day of the weekend like a Sunday. Then they alternate the weekends every other week. This roles could also flip with who has them more the dad or the mom. The kids have a life also. They have school, they have friends and the kids can choose if they want to stay back with the primary care spouse so they can stay and hangout with there friends during the weekend. Also someone could earn full custody of their children depending on the situation. Sometimes when divorce happens the one of the parent doesn't really care about their children or don't want to have to deal with the fact of switching off the kids so they just leave and that gives the other spouse full custody. Or if one of the parents are very abusive or something serious the other spouse will get full custody of their children.

    There was this couple in my ward who had 4 kids. In fact they just had one of their last children together like right before they ended up getting into a divorce. The parents knew each other in high school and where best friends throughout high school and ended up falling in love and getting married and having kids obviously together. She ended up leaving the Church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints which was super surprising and then asked for a divorce. She told her spouse that he could have full custody of the children and he won that in court. The parents are still friends and he lets her come over if she ever wants to see her kids. The man ended up getting remarried to an amazing women. That is probably one of the easiest marriages that I have seen. But also he now had to find care for his children who now don't have their stay at home mom or anything. The people in our ward stepped up and babysat and made sure their kids had a place to stay when they got home from school and usually it was a neighbors house with kids their age. They have now figured it out and he remarried someone that now watches the kids. 

    Also a lot of the time when men do get divorce and they don't have full custody they move far away. There are a couple reasons that they do move away and one of them is because of money. When you get in a divorce the person who has a bigger income has to pay child support and usually it is the dad. So they move away thats far so they can get a better income to help support their children. Another reason is, they want to get away from the conflict and the whole divorce situation so they move far away to get away form their problem. 

    One more thing I like to talk about that I thought was interesting was, that people who decided to live with each other before marriage think that it will help them decided if they want to marry them. Well first off usually that is not the case it is usually worse. They are more likely to have depression, are less successful, more anxiety and can be suicidal. This surprises me because most of the time when people move in with each other before marriage they are trying to prevent divorce but it could cause a lot more than protecting against divorce.